Fears and Trembles
by Impassive Tears
Summary: After everything, Tweek never ceases to be a beautiful vampire. Or maybe he's just beautiful, in Craig's corrupt mind. AU.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: The idea of this made me laugh a little bit :) Basically, Craig has Tweek's symptoms, like his twitching and paranoia, instead of Tweek. I think that's the only change I've made in them, really. **

**Kyle's Mission and Life As We Know It will be updated tomorrow if I get 2 more reviews on both, merci!**

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><p>Craig clenched his hands as he walked down the hallway, his thumbs extending to lay on the top of his fingers. He bit down on his lip as he heard the first sign of human activity. They could <em>not <em>have been humans though, he figured. Maybe they were all spies, or underwear gnomes, like his neighbour, Kyle, had suggested. Well, Kyle hadn't actually suggested, so much as agreed, albeit a bit hesitantly and said with the twitch of a freckled cheek. Kyle was always applying logic to situations, and so Craig trusted him, just as he did all clever and responsible people. The kids here… they definitely weren't going to be clever _or _responsible.

He wished Kyle could come to this new place with him, but Kyle was way up in High School, so Craig was going to be all alone. He liked it like that. In fact, he had spent most of his life by himself in his room, never having any friends, save for Kyle, and, occasionally, his boyfriend Stan, come over. He lived in a solitary, isolated setting, his time being spent caring for his Guinea pig, Stripe, and watching the little toddlers playing outside, pondering over what it would be like to laugh and bounce about like them. He thought their names were Clyde and Leo, but he had no certain way of telling, of course.

So, Craig really did not have much experience in the social department. He doubted he would ever develop the skills needed to fit in. He felt, no, knew, that many refrained from as little as looking at him due to his irrational theories, and his minute body convulsions. His parents blamed it all on ADD, but he knew that Parker, Kyle's dog, was secretly a disguised government representive who sent him subliminal messages every now and then just to make him freak out…

Something like that.

He dared casting his eyes up from the polished, wooden floor to gaze at the pack of boys turning the corner. His hands shook and he gulped. Would they talk to him? He pulled on his blue chullo anxiously, standing rigid in the middle of the corridor. He felt their stare beating at him, and found it hard to breathe. They sauntered up to him, whispering amongst themselves all the way.

"Hi. Are you the new boy?" The most youthful one asked, and Craig cringed. He hated beautiful people. They were too perfect; it made him feel insecure. The pretty one in question was the asker, seemingly the leader of the group. He had straight, floppy blonde hair that blew over his green eyes, a button nose, a permanently pouting set of lips and a small frame. Craig didn't know how he pulled it all off with a somewhat boyish style.

Craig realised he was yet to answer the question, and blushed as he noticed he had stared at the blonde for way too long. "Y-yes. My name is – mmp! – Craig!" He stuttered, desperately wanting to pull at his dark strands. The gang seemed slightly taken aback at his outburst, but the flawless boy simply giggled, hiding his mouth with a delicate, pale hand. Craig was shocked at how pale he was.

Good god, was he a vampire?!

Craig tried to calm his thoughts as another one piped up. "It's nice to meet you. My name is Token." Token outstretched a dark hand and Craig shook it gingerly, eyes flitting over them all. They took this as an invitation to all introduce themselves, accompanied with awkward actions.

"Kevin." Smiled.

"J-j-j-j-j-j-j-j-jimmy!" Grinned.

"Thomas." Bit nails.

"I'm Tweek." Craig smiled at the odd name, and getting to know someone better. Already, he thought he could see Tweek as a friend, even if he was a beautiful vampire.

"Well, we have to – SHIT!- go…" Thomas muttered awkwardly, blushing as he involuntarily swore. Craig jerked his head up and down gently as the three of them left, leaving only Craig and Tweek.

"We should be friends." Tweek enthused, adjusting the bag slung on his shoulder. Craig's eyes widened and his lips quirked again. All of a sudden, he was encased in warm arms, and he was filled with love.

"Welcome to South Park!" Then Tweek ran off, unknowing of the heart he just broke.

Maybe school wouldn't be so bad…

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><p><strong>Meep, I love Craig as an uke! But I think Craig could still be a potential top in this universe, but Tweek will be in for a shaky ride! <strong>**Oh dear, what is life.**

**You know what to do, Houston. **


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: Oh gee, I am such a pushover when it comes to writing stories... I hope you guys like this next tidbit!**

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><p>Craig found out that he was to be in the same form as Thomas and Tweek, but not Jimmy and Token. He didn't mind too much, though. He was two rows behind Tweek, and found him much more interesting than what the Teacher said.<p>

However, the Teacher didn't find Tweek quite too interesting. In fact, on occasion, he had cruelly snapped at Craig, always along the lines of "No, Tweek's head is not the west of Columbia, Craig" and each time his cheeks went bright red, and he ducked down, before highering his eyes once again. He didn't think Tweek minded though, because at the end of the day Tweek joined him, though, not in the most tactful way.

"BOO!" Tweek laughed, pouncing on Craig and almost knocking him over. Craig shrieked, but then muffled it as soon as he saw it was Tweek. Craig wasn't sure how many times he had blushed that day, but he tacked another unit onto the ambiguous score as he shied away from Tweek slightly.

Where had he even come from? He just appeared out of mid-air! Oh great. Now Tweek was a beautiful vampire wizard? He shuddered, then noticed Tweek had a cup cradled in his hands. He wondered what of. Blood?

"Hey, so," Sip. "I was wondering if," Sip. "you wanted to," Sip. "come round my house for a sleepover tonight?" Sip. The whole time Tweek had been talking, Craig had stared at his mouth intently, trying to see any traces of blood. All clear. Suddenly, Tweek waved a hand in front of his face.

"GAH!" He cried, and Tweek shushed him, apologising.

"Sorry, dude! You were just staring at me, you ok?" Craig nodded, reeling from all the shocks Tweek had given him. It really was too much pressure being around that kid. He remembered what Tweek asked, and panicked over what to say. Yes? That would be suicide! Going to a vampire's layre? That would be ignorant, as Kyle would say. But, he looked at Tweek's concerned expression, and found himself saying,

"Nngh – I'm fine… And o-okay, I'll come." He had better be prepared with garlic and a wooden stake, he thought, shaking. Tweek smiled, then took another sip, and Craig couldn't keep his mouth shut.

"W-what are you drinking?" Craig asked, preparing to run and scream at the top of his lungs if Tweek replied with something alarming. Luckily, he didn't, but Craig's suspicions did not die down.

"Coffee." Tweek furrowed his eyebrows, giving him a peculiar smile. "Want a taste?" Craig's eyes widened in horror. Coffee his ass. If it wasn't blood, it had to be some kind of potion, and there was no way in hell he was drinking that. He took another step back, petrified Tweek would force him to drink it.

"No? Ok, more for me." Tweek grinned, gulping the remains before chucking it in the bin next to Craig, resulting in another cry from the dark haired boy, thinking Tweek was chucking it at him.

"Tweek!" A skinny boy, almost as skinny as Tweek, suddenly attacked Tweek, and Craig balled his fists, even though he knew he wouldn't stand a chance. Though, Tweek emerged laughing, and Craig got a look at the assailant, a parka clad blonde. He felt a foreign feeling as the boy draped his arms around Tweek's shoulder. He had no idea what.

"Who's this?" Kenny asked, gesturing towards Craig. Tweek blinked, remembering him.

"Oh, this is Craig. Craig, this is Kenny." Kenny gave him a Cheshire cat grin and Craig gulped, finding he no longer could take a step back; his back was against the wall.

"Not one for chatting, huh?" Kenny dismissed, turning back to Tweek. "What you up to tonight, Tweekers? You wanna come round mine?" Craig observed the two, feeling uncomfortable. He wondered if Kenny knew Tweek was a vampire, too.

"Sorry Ken, I can't. Craig's coming round my house." Craig could have sworn Kenny gave him a quick, subtle glare. "I'll catch up with you later though." Tweek relented, grabbing Kenny's hand. Craig frowned, seeing them do an odd routine with their hands. What was it, some kind of cult code?

"Come on, Craig, let's go." Tweek smiled, and Craig followed obediently, crossing himself behind Tweek's back.

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><p><strong>That's called jealousy Craigfer.<strong>


	3. Chapter 3

Craig trailed after Tweek the whole way to the Tweak layre, at least a few cautious feet between them. Alarm bells were ringing in Craig's mind the while, screaming at him to abort, retreat, run away, _something _other than condemn himself to have his blood drained. Or worse, became one of them. What if Craig only became half-vampire, and his fangs are too short to pierce into his victims' necks? What if he starved from lack of blood? What if he spent eternity in agony because vampires can't die? What if stronger vampires came to pick on him and –

"I don't want to be a v-vampire!" Craig screamed, and Tweek turned around, his eyes wide open. The entirety of the journey, Tweek had been silent. Probably plotting Craig's murder. Now they were standing in front of a coffee shop.

Not that Craig believed it was real coffee, not one bit.

"Calm down, it's just me." Just the causer of Craig's inevitable death. "I won't suck your blood or make you turn." Tweek smiled, shaking his head, resulting in a few honey strands falling into his eyes. It seemed Tweek was a lying vampire. "We're here now, anyway. Did I tell you my parents own Tweak Bros?" He tilted his head and Craig bit his lip so hard it drew blood. He yelped and quickly wiped it away with his sleeve, petrified Tweek would drink from him here and then.

"Come on," Tweek made a grab for his hand, and Craig jolted away, screaming at the sudden move. Tweek raised an eyebrow, and moved back away. Craig might have actually liked to hold Tweek's hand, because Tweek was warm, but Tweek was a vampire and – weren't vampires supposed to be cold-blooded? Craig dismissed the doubt, he was probably thinking too far into it. Tweek was a vampire and that was that.

Craig tried to refrain from pulling at his hair as he followed Tweek through the busy shop, avoiding eye contact with all the strangers. Still, Craig figured should Tweek attempt to take his blood, at least they were in a public place where Craig would have a hope if surviving. That was until Tweek lead him up to the stairs to the Tweak lodgings, and into his bedroom.

Craig figured it looked like an ordinary room, save for the Parrot – that gave him the creeps. Tweek noticed him staring at the monstrous creature in question. "That's James." Tweek smiled, stroking him through the cage. "He's not a talking Parrot, though." Tweek reassured, making Craig shudder. It's always the silent ones who become psychopaths.

"So what do you like to do?" Tweek asked, looking over at Craig, who was frozen in the hallway. "Mom should be done with dinner soon…" Tweek carried on, when Craig didn't respond with anything more than a "GAH!". Craig bet on his life that it wasn't going to be a typical pasta bake. Wait, he didn't mean that! He just cursed his own life! Jesus Christ! Oh no, and he just said a holy being's name in vain! He's going to hell –

Tweek waved his hand in front of Craig's face, approaching him slowly. Craig sped away from him, sitting on the bed. Everyone knew bed's protect you from demons…Tweek only copied him, sitting on the bed. Craig ground his teeth habitually. Tweek's eyes flickered to the TV screen. "Wanna watch TV?" Tweek offered.

Craig gulped. "N-not a – nngh – horror!" He shook his head furiously and Tweek giggled, telling Craig he didn't like them either. Craig watched the screen cautiously as Tweek turned on Red Racer. Craig's eyes lit up, and something fluttered inside of him, making him extremely alarmed, but he was focused on the fact it was his favourite show.

"Gah, this is my f-favourite show." Craig admitted quietly, and Tweek smiled at him, shuffling up on the bed, nearing Craig. Craig's heart thudded, but he didn't move. Not even when Tweek lay his head on his shoulder. After all, he knew if he angered the young vampire he would have no escape from the blonde's wrath.

Yeah, that was it.

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><p><strong>PN*: Hello, guvner. How are you? You read this fic, how kind and jolly nice of you. Did you like it? You should let the author know in the review section, old chap.**

***Pip's Note**


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